Did An Eat : Temple Of Seitan, Hackney. London, UK 🇬🇧

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Here’s a nugget of information: I’ve never eaten at KFC.

That’s right. The colonel’s wing-a-lings have never touched my lips. Being veggie since I was a spring chicken, the stuff always looked kinda fowl to me.

So when a vegan chicken shop hatched in London, I had to have a crack at it.

Feeling peckish last Saturday morning (ok, sorry, promise I’m done with the chicken puns), I headed along to see what all the fuss was about.

Fear washed over me as I realised it was two hours to closing and my chances of ordering everything on the menu was diminishing.

However, my fears were unfounded as I left with two bags full of fake chickeny goodness that I’d probably work my way through one eighth of. (Worry not, waste watchers – I had my boyfriend and a band of merry mates at hand to help polish the rest off)

And polish it off we did!

(warning: here comes the #foodporn)

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First off, nailed that packaging lads! 🙌   The iconography is a total graphical win.

Design jizzery out of the way, let’s get to the food!

I had the Temple Burger. The seitan was juicy. The batter, very tasty and it had a cheeky little strip of fake bacon in there. Bonus! It was so big and filling I barely made it halfway through! Ludz had the same and it vanished within seconds which is always a good sign.

The fries and coleslaw were fine, but then they’re not the stars of the show.

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Mac and cheese tasting went a little like this:

*eats spoonful*

‘Hmm… yes…’

*eats bigger spoonful*

‘…it’s… interesting…’

*crams in three spoonfuls*

‘…nice. Kinda… truffly…’

*crams in three more spoonfuls*

‘…so full… but… it’s… soooo… good…’

*tips remaining contents of container in face*

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I also bought a carton of ‘popcorn seitan’ because, why the hell not. They were pretty morish, I found myself picking at them long after I was full. (Actually put the leftovers in my pocket to eat throughout the day a la Napolean Dynamite)

In short, it’s a damn winner! Go check it out mother cluckkkkeeeeerrrrs!

Official DV Rating: 4 and a half out of 5 Aubergines 😘

🍆  🍆  🍆  🍆 ➕

DVx

📍Find this, and more dirty eats on my interactive A to V Map

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